Brain Mush

Hey guys. So I’m like 18 days away from brain surgery and my brain is just a mess. We already know my nerves are bad, hence the reason for the surgery. But lately, between the chronic pain, planning for surgery, and the fear and anxiety that go with it, my brain is total mush.

I get all these ideas of things to write, yet I never actually do it. I have note after note in my phone with ideas for blogs or poems or stories and there they sit, just in the note pad, not going anywhere, not being seen by anyone. Such a sad thought, huh.

So I promised myself today that I would post on my blog. That I would get back into writing, no matter how mundane and repetitive. I intended to keep everyone posted with like daily updates on my journey towards surgery. Obvs, that hasn’t happened. I have a hard enough time keeping up with my school work, the kids’ school work, and the household crap. Ugh.

Anyhow, so surgery is getting closer. I have been working on a plan for who will have the kids and who will help me at home once my hospital stay is over. That isn’t going well. This coming weekend I will be meal prepping probably 40 meals, just in case I am down for a while. Honestly, I thought part of being in a “close-knit” community meant I wouldn’t have to worry about such things during times like this, but it seems I don’t know the right people or something. So I’m just going to plan myself and make sure my kids are covered when I’m not able to cook for them. I mean, this is major surgery. I won’t bounce right back and be in the kitchen like June Cleaver the day after they slice into my skull. Right?

So meal prepping it is. Any ideas are greatly appreciated! You could comment here with suggestions!

For now, I’m going to write as many things as I can and see if I can get my creative juices flowing again through all this messed up crap in my head.

 

My New Normal

Yesterday I was diagnosed with now a 3rd pain disorder… Er disfunction/disease/ailment/illness that causes pain. I don’t even know what to call it. All I know is I’m really over it.

I’m over not being the woman I want to be. I’m over not being the mom I was; the mom my kids deserve. I’m over people questioning my constant illnesses and my constant pain. I’m over people making jokes when I slur my words or when I walk with a limp. I’m over this daily struggle.

But it’s my new normal. I have to learn to deal. 3 years ago I woke up with a migraine that never left. Thankfully, botox injections ease them enough so that I can function. Almost 2 years ago I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. That was also a major change and adjustment. One I still struggle with daily. And now trigeminal neuralgia. I do not know much about it yet other than it’s rare, it’s painful, it can happen to anyone, and there is no cure; only the attempt at treatment.

I am not looking for sympathy or anything. I am primarily writing this just so I can get it out. So I can face the music and say to myself, “this is your new normal so learn to deal”….

I’m not sure what the future holds or if the meds will help me. I also don’t know what fresh hell awaits me for next year. Anyone wanna place bets? I’m kidding, don’t be so sensitive!

Until next time….

My New Journey

Hey guys. As I’ve touched on in previous posts, I struggle with fibromyalgia. I finally said enough is enough. Last week I decided to give something else a try. After a few discussions with my doctor regarding gut health, and a few chats with a good friend, I began my journey with Plexus.

Just a few days in and I feel AMAZING! I can tell you that I know this is going to be life changing for me. As I discussed with my friend, I’m going to share my journey here because I would like to reach a greater audience than just my facebook page. I hope you all will enjoy seeing me go from the miserable woman I had become with fibro back to the energetic and active mom of three!

If anyone is interested in learning me, comment here and we can set up a line of communication. This product is already changing my life, it could change yours too!

~What if you could change everything?

~Kristen