When You Love Someone

When you love someone, you will do the most ridiculous things! When they don’t love you back quite the same, or at all, you will reach new levels of ridiculousness. You will look like a fool, to them, to yourself, and at times, to those around you. You will put yourself out there only to have your heart crushed by the inevitable truth that they just don’t love you the same, or at all.

Love them anyway. People who have been hurt in the past may be a little more difficult to love, but no less worthy of your love. So love them anyway. Love them with all that you have. Show them what love should be. Sure, you have to learn at some point when to stop pushing for something that may not be meant to be. And finding that fine line may be difficult. But don’t give up. Love that person anyway. Even if just from a distance. And if you decide that it’s best to walk away, you can still love them. Nobody can make you stop doing that. Love them anyway.

Understand that their inability to receive your love is not a reflection of you, but a reflection of all that they are struggling to overcome. As humans, we inherently crave love. We seek out those that we find can provide us with the comforts of a loving relationship. But some people have been damaged by the toxicity of their pasts. Those people are the ones that deserve a little more love.

I’m not telling you to give so much of yourself and get nothing in return, time after time. I am telling you to be patient and understanding. If the person you love tells you they love you, but they are struggling with demons of whatever kind, be patient with them. That is part of the deal. Learning to be patient, considerate, and compassionate are all difficult things when you feel like it should come as easy for them as it does for you. I get that. Trust me! It just isn’t that easy for some. Not after some of the things people have gone through.

I write these words as a woman that is very difficult to love, or at least I once was. Now, I’m the woman trying so desperately to be patient with the man I love while he figures out how he wants to move forward; scarred from his past. And I think of all the times people gave up on me because I was a little more difficult than they thought I should be. I won’t be that person. I won’t give up on him.

~Kristen

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